I feel like the Incredibe Hulk.
My back has been broke and I can still walk.
Why have I suddenly had a burst of anger?
It's strange. I'm not pissed off. Upset.
I just have a sense of urgency about me. Bring everyone up to speed.
Jog their memories.
Remember me? I'm the kid who used to make you all laugh.
No? Oh okay.
Who am I now? I don't know. It's not a horrible feeling if I'm honest.
It means I can be who I like. Different masks for different occasions.
Woman-bashing chauvanist in one place.
Casanova in another.
Predator. Hiss my lines. Snare you in. Next thing you know I've devoured you for better or worse.

I have no cares for you plastic people anymore. I used to enjoy baiting you.
Now I enjoy sitting back and watching you destroy yourselves.
Maturity. Amazing thing. I'll lose it soon enough so for now be appreciative.
I hit my bottom the other day. I have no intention of pulling myself back up.
I'd rather wallow in this fucked up mindset I'm in. It's fun.
"Fuck the world" I scream. Nah too much effort.
Time to fall back onto the good days of whiskey,cigarettes and lust.
Not that I'll act on it. I have an uncaring female to hold tending too first.
With that said and done. Sleep well. Why I'm even writing this I have no idea nobody reads it.
But hey better out than in ay?

Sore sight.

You're just showing me what I despise.
A sore sight for sore eyes.
Jealousy raring it's ugly fucking head and attacking me, tackling me to the ground.
I try to kick it off me,wrestle it but its a feeble attempt.
In all honesty I love this feeling. I love the feeling of conflict. Enjoy it too.
Can I explain why I'm taken under? Yes and no.
I hate the fact all you do is mention other lads. Comparisons if you will.
I hate the fact that you still keep in touch with your ex. He that amazing?
Go back to him. I'll still be here face down in my own vomit. Churned up within my turmoiled soul.
It shouldn't even bother me. Really shouldn't. My minds past the point of reasoning.
Fuck it. Pick up move on. There are no metaphors I want to lay down here.
I've got nothing I can hide behind. Simply the fact is you piss me off good and proper.
And yet I can't leave it. Is it your vagina? Most likely. Is it the laughs we have? probably.
But fuck it. Play your game. Go. Play. Have fun. Just don't blame me when my heart reverts back to the dirt from whence it came.

Recovery.

I'm trying to curb my addictions to prescriptions
Its sickening
I'm ashamed.
I'm stuck in the walls of my brain, going crazed, died twice and my memores hazed.
Brought back to life for some kind of reason
My change in mod is like a change in season
Not very often I brighten
And enlighten those around me
Who hound me.
Calm down. Breathe. Let out a sigh of relief.
Life ain't what it seems.
Is sanity really insane?
Is delusion really an illusion?
I try to be honest but people don't like the way it comes across
They try to boss and control you.
Make you suicidal.
I'm not naming names but I'm ashamed I ever met you.
For all the times that I cried I hope this upsets you.
Please believe you mean nothing to me and I'm leaving
Adios,bye, see you later.
Departing with a FUCK YOU for the haters.

Testimony of Jimmy Follows.
I'm clean and you can' fuck this up for me.

Fuuuuuuuuck you.

What do I want?
There are things I need. I need stability. Motivation. A good kick in the arse.
But seriously what do I want?
I have no clue. A woman most definetly but how do I want her?
My taste changes almost instantaneously.
Things that stick.
1) Brown hair.
2) Nice eyes.
3) Be a dirtbag. I mean fuck me theres a lot of girls out there but if they see the shit I wanna try they'd run to the fucking mountains and never come back. (Unless I unlocked something in them)
Argue back too. I mean I don't want a relationship consisting of just arguments but don't bow down to me and apologise if it was my fault.
Don't fuck me around either. I ain't stupid. I'll meticulously take you apart piece by piece.
I have a girl in mind right now. It ain't gonna happen. No worries. I've discovered I have something that must put women off me. My last few putrid attempts of wooing someone have spectacularly crawled up their own arses and imploded.
That is all I want.
Smile.

If you're tired of relationships, try a romance.

Relationships are generic.
Just another cog in the machine. Marry,reproduce,die.
Where's the fun in that?
I'll ask a question. Do you want to go through the motions?
Or do you want something more? A connection, fun, real love.
Short but sweet.
Don't want a relationship. Come take a romantic trip with me.

Lets Pretend.

Okay.
Lets pretend things were different.
Lets pretend he was a happy kid.
His parents never divorced in 96,
forcing him to become so love sick.
His step-dad wasn't a prick,
and managed to keep his dick,
in his pants for 5 more minutes.
Pretend that he wasn't crying at night,
wishing his family would stick
together for a while just to bring,
happiness to the table
and he had a girlfriend he could say loved him,
for who he is.
Pretend he wasn't asking,
a load of questions like
why his Dad never wanted to see him at weekends.
Took till he was ten to even get a whiff
of fucking at-ten-tion.
His family never hated him
and blamed him for the crumbling foundations.
His lover wasn't crazy as shit
and made him pop pills just to feel un-different.
He saw his friends outside of school
and wasn't smoking or drinking away the stress
to hide the fact from his parents that he felt so fucking depressed.
Now get this bitch!
He's happy with how things worked out
even if he lost his soul and his mind
it doesn't matter at this time
all of this shit just means he's got more work cut out.
He can smile and hide all of this shit
inside that cranium of his
like the alienated prick that he is.
A brother, three sisters
he needs to stay strong for
and hope they get the life that he longed for
and if they don't what the fuck can he do?
Nothing.
He'll just keep on smiling for you.

The return.

And now I return with new words,wisdoms and whims.
How is life now? Complete bollocks and yet I'm smiling a lot.
Why? I know how to play this game.
It has become apparent to me over the last month or so that when we all die we will sit and ro in a grave.
Whether you want to believe in a God of some kind,some immortal being who will save you from damnation, is completely in your hands.
Me? Fuck that I'm dieing and dieing well. Pissed up,fucked up and content.
Good times.
Now, whilst I'm wallowing in self-pity at the distress I supposedly find myself in, I smile and fucking laugh.
I have no woman, no money and no importance.
Bullshit.
I have a world of women, endless amounts of money to obtain and my importance will come as my world expands.
Smile fuckers.
Peace.